The Family

Soon after we shifted to the government quarter, the family began to grow. The mother of my stepfather who was her only son stayed with us. She did not like me and my mother. She was the reason why I left home at the age of fourteen. When I left, there were only three sons and three daughters.

Today I have four stepbrothers (Jeff, Phillips, Boy and Jimmy) and five stepsisters (Doris, Nancy, Jennifer, Stephanie and Margaret. I lost count of how many children they have. Some of their children got married in recent years. When both our parents were alive, we met occasionally. My mother passed away in 1986 and my stepfather went in 2006 at the age of eighty five.

My stepfather did not earn enough to support the family. My education was effected. It was just food on the table. Sometimes he had to borrow money from the Indian money lenders. The quarter had a large compound, and his mother planted vegetables and reared chickens. Occasionally there were people who came to buy vegetables and chickens. I helped out watering the plants and doing household work including cooking. That was the life.

The only time I spent with my stepfather was in the 1950s’. During my school holidays I cycled to his workplace carrying his lunch. While he had his lunch, I looked into the office bins for used postal stamps. Stamp collecting was a common hobby in those days. I used to sell foreign stamps to my classmates, and that was my pocket money.

My mother and my stepfather were the same age. Both are Buddhist while all the children except Boy are Christians. Years after my mother passed away, he complained to me whenever I visited him that he was very lonely. I could not understand him then. He bought a house and retired from the civil service at the age of fifty five with monthly pension. The married children stayed nearby and visited him very often. Besides Philips (the unmarried one) stayed with him.

Being a Buddhist my mother was cremated and her ashes kept in a Chinese temple. My stepfather got very sick in his late 70’s. All the years after my mother was gone, the children tried to convert him into a Christian. He was very stubborn but when he was bedridden in his 80’s, he was forced to be a Christian just before his death.

One month after his burial I visited the temple where my mother’s urn was kept. The keeper of the temple related to me this story.

Twenty years ago the husband of the deceased would visit the temple on every full moon and half moon days of the month. He came alone by bus with some fruits as offering. He sat in front of the urn and cried all the time. He never failed to turn up until seven years ago.

I told the keeper that the old man was my stepfather. He was bedridden for seven years and passed away recently.

I was a shopping mall manager in the early 1990s’ and my stepfather used to come around every month. I understand now that he came to me after visiting the temple. The children are Christian and would not step into Buddhist temples. That was why he traveled by bus that took him two hours to reach from his home to the temple.

Before converting my stepfather, I spoke to Nancy (the second younger stepsister) but since he was their own father, I kept my silence. As my last respect I kissed his forehead as he crossed over. Maybe they would not know how to handle a dead Buddhist father.

There was an empty space next to my mother’s urn. I guess he would prefer to be there rather the heaven that was promised. Both shared a good lifetime together. In the dawn of life I lost some who I care for.